i never thought that i'd be using this again..

idk, maybe i got fed up writing in my journal that's why i'm here again typing my random thoughts about how life has been so much good and bad to me. it's been a year since i had my last post here and alot has changed. i'm done with highschool's drama and now i'm enjoying the life as a college freshman. i can't say that i'm fulfilled with what's goin on in my life right now but i'm soaking up every bits of the happiness that its giving me.

gahd, i think this is the effect of not planning on posting something relevant.. haha! i think this is it.. i got nothing more to say... i am just so random at this moment.. better read my blah blah's next time..

adios.

thats just how highschool is..
people are shallow and dumb and they're going to talk about you..
someone will find you and create DRAMA..theres no way to AVOID it

i haven't done anything good this week.. haha! official bum... and i still haven't post an entry in my blogspot account cause i'm totally lazy this past few days.. i mean i do update on the sidebar but the blog's still stuck with my PBB entry.. crap! i know i'll be able to put something on it but it isn't just worth it.. it'll be all just nonsense blah blahs... well at least in here no one actually reads this so yea.. hahahahaha! that was crazy like shit... how pathetic... *i'm bein weird again, isn't it?!*

anyhows,, my real reason for posting an entry here is to put a stop on my blah blahs bout the past 2 entries i made... hahaha! cause i figured out that she's all what i've been talkin about and it makes others think i'm the one who's jealous.. which is totally not.. *enuff said*

don't call me obsessed when i'm only scared
of losing the best thing that's ever happened to me.

[edit] i dunno how to react to the things that are happenin' right now,, i know i should be happy and all cause me & my bhabhie will be celebratin' our 6th monthsary on May 6 *how kool ish that!?* then my silent revenge thingy worked... but still i feel so down.. and the revenge thingy kinda made me like this.. i dunno why!? loseeer! hahaha.. but i guess,, it's all because i made her life so beautiful but she ended up messin it.. now,, she's ignored and bein' laughed at.. and to think,, all i was askin' for was a simple appreciation from her but guess what!? she have done things that made me do such horrible things to her.. i once made it beautiful and i also made her mess much much more worse.. i wanna think she'll be okay.. but i guess,, she wouldn't.. maybe she'll let others think she is but deep down.. she's not.. well that's her choice.. she shouldn't had been so mean to me.. and my friends... especially to my best bud.... awww,, wait,,,!? he's my bestboybud in our group... oh welll... hahahaha! we share the same skill in makin our enemies lives miserable,,, and this is an accomplishment.. bow..[/edit] 

screw YOU for bein such a PSYCHO PATHETIC LOSER..!

.the end.

that was bleak... sheesh... NONSENSE.. but i'll be editin it.. later or tomorrow.. whatever.. but i'll edit it... seriously.

for 3 days... i've felt so very happy... why? cause all i did was talk to my bhabhie all day... hahaha! we never did that before and it was like WOW... i've been wishing for this day to come over the last 5 months... and it did happen... swell... though it's kinda bit weird cause i wasn't really used to it... but i had FUN... ^______^

my brother went to the province already.. and i might not see him for the rest of the year... why? cause he's not goin to study here.. it's all kool but it sucks at the same time cause now all the attention are on me.. and i don't want it... well at least there is kamilla... i don't think it'll be a major problem for me... nice...

i've been wanting to see LY for like a month now but still.. i haven't.. fcuk! i was like so ready to see him but i have no concrete plans for my great escape... gawd! i'm like a prisoner here.. and i don't even get to go elsewhere... grrr! hate it... if only he's just a neighbor.. maybe i won't be just sittin' my ass out here... grrr!!!! I WANNA SEE HIM.... oh shoot! i forgot i'm also broke.. which means i have no way to go to his place... just the luck... grrrr...

ahhhhhhh! damn... the swimming party is cancelled....! i was like so waitin' for this day and what happened!? poof! it got cancelled just like that.. oh well.... i still have this reunion to attend this 25th.... and if this gets messed up again.. imma go kill the f-ing shit who tries to ruin it... hah! yes i'm goin to to that! so be warned... lol! kiddin... but still be warned....

anyhow,,, i got a testimonial from a stranger named jayson... who's like actin' that i'm looking for him and stuff which is totally not true.. unfortunately my bf was the one who got to read it which really got him furious... and know what happened...? hahaha... nvm,, i wouldn't bother tellin you cause... i dunno.. hahahaha! how dumb...

actually, those things are the ones that annoys me about the net world... cause people, stalker or not, can act like someone you know and make a big fuss out of it & sometimes you wouldn't know if they really are true or just posers... doin what they love,,, fakin'...

and it doesn't make any difference with those who are really fake in the real world... i mean,,, you wouldn't know who they really are and what they are to you unless you investigate or see the real him/her... and sometimes it's even more difficult to be friends with the real people than those who are on the net... why? cause they are good fakers when in the real world... since they have enuff skills and experience when they were still doin it on the net...

uhmmm.... does it hurt hun??

BOOM...!!!!!!